29 January 2016

29 January 2016: Consolato Generale d'Italia Los Angeles: Non Sono Felice!

After what I thought was a very thorough investigation into visa requirements for living in Italy (I'm a big list maker and pretty meticulous about these things), I fill out my application, gather tons of supporting documentation, and schedule my appointment at the Consulate in Century City.  I march in through the metal detectors, pretty confident that I have done what is necessary to apply for elective residence. 

Aspetta! (translation: Wait!) Not so fast amica!

The woman who meets with me (20 minutes late for the appointment to which I was instructed to arrive 15 minutes early) tells me right away that I should not have paid any attention to the visa requirements on their website, but rather for elective residence visas you need to go to the official state department website. (WHY DON'T THEY MENTION THIS ANYWHERE IN WRITING???) And then she pulls out a whole new list of requirements that I must fulfill to secure this visa.  Letters from banks documenting my financial viability and investments that generate substantial income of at least Euro 31,000 annually (not just the financial statements I have already provided), tons of different paperwork related to my house purchase that I do not yet have in my possession, etc.  AND she proceeds to tell me that this process can take anywhere from 3 weeks to three months for a decision. I AM FLYING IN 5 WEEKS.  ON A PRIVATE JET FOR WHICH WE HAVE JUST PAID A WAD OF CASH. AND ALL OF MY WORDLY POSSESSIONS ARE ON A SHIP  BOUND FOR GENOA!!!

I am home now.  Taking a Xanax.  Pouring a glass of wine.  And contemplating my strategy.  There has to be a way around this.

In any case, I'm getting on that plane on March 4. At minimum as a tourist. If I have to leave within 90 days and come back here to wrap things up?  So be it.  Come hell or high water....that's my new mantra.

NB:  ALL CAPS in this case really does represent the fact that I am YELLING!

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